Beliefs and ideas that answer unspecified questions.

A book called To-Do List, listography.com, and McSweeney's has me on a list kick.

- Nothing is black and white. There's always a gray area, an exception to the rule, something that makes your absolute fall to pieces and consequently drives you insane.

- Nothing lasts forever, and that's a good thing.

- Perspective is everything.

- Sometimes it really is necessary to convince yourself something is true when you know it isn't.

- There is often no rational explanation for how we feel.

- Everyone needs someone or something to talk to. Preferably someone or something that will react. No matter how much you don't want to, people need other people. People want to feel needed. Sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is let them see you need them.

- Everything we do has an impact on something else, no matter how minor.

- "It takes all kinds of people to make a world."

- There's a time and place for everything, and if either is off by even a little, it changes everything.

- There is a small but distinct difference between making an excuse and giving an explanation.

- Sometimes all you need is for someone to have faith in you.

- Miscommunication, misunderstanding, and assumption are the root of way too many problems. Just talking straightforwardly can fix that.

- Mass media is messing everyone up, majorly.

- Instant messages, emails, phone calls, letters. They give people space and bravado so they say things they wouldn't otherwise say in person. For better or worse.

- Sometimes, taking a deep breath really does help.

- Your probability of being happy in life is a lot higher if you find a passion and follow it.

- Images affect us more than anything else. We absorb thousands every day and don't take much notice, but they're there.

- Simplicity and complexity are both gifts.

- Everything is relative.

- Appearances are superficial, but image isn't unimportant, even though the way others see you is often very different from the way you see yourself.

- Life is a lot easier and more pleasant when you stop caring what others think and how they see you, when you stop trying to impress people, and just be yourself. Everything is more real.

- Photography is great as a means of recording something that will become a memory, but it hinders living in the moment, and sometimes sacrificing the photos are worth it.

- There is a lot to be said for abstract thoughts and goals and dreams, but sometimes something concrete and tangible is necessary to believe.

- Everyone should believe in something.

- Life is happier when you let there be magic.

- Self-denial is admirable, but being able to indulge in moderation is, too.

- Everything in the world, in life, rests on a pinpoint, and all you can do is try to keep it balanced.

- So much pain could be prevented if, more frequently, we just asked "How are you?", "Are you okay?", or "Do you want to talk?", and actually listened to the response.

- Political correctness is overrated. But, at the same time, insensitivity isn't.

- Never let anyone, even yourself, tell you that you're not allowed to feel the way you're feel, or that you're not supposed to feel the way you do.

- Everyone is connected. Realizing a connection is the hard part--making it a full, rich, reality. But succeeding, even with only one person, is one of the greatest accomplishments.

- Sometimes you have trust others to get them to trust you.

- Everything works for good.

- Meditation or relaxation frees the mind. Freeing the mind opens it. Having an open minds lets you see the humor, beauty, and good everything.

- Getting angry is healthy. Holding onto your anger isn't.

- Whoever said "patience is a virtue" was right.

- You never really "get over" losing someone you love. You just learn how to accept it and turn it into something else. And if you loved them, you never really lose them, because they've had an impact you--they've made a difference in your life and it's a part of you. The pain just mellows out.

- "Nothing is unforgivable. Not where there's love."

- Passion is transformative and the expression of passion is the epitome of beauty.

- "What you feel only matters to you. It's what you do to the people you say you love, that's what matters."

- Sometimes, what we do is not a reflection of who we are.

- It's a good idea to reevaluate your priorities from time to time.

- If you like something that becomes popular, you don't have to stop liking it.

- "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish."

- "You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier."

- Everyone is at least little hypocritical sometimes.

- "A person doesn't need to be perfect to be exactly what you need."

- Taking care of yourself is just as important as taking care of others.

- Group thinking is dangerous. Listen to others, be open to them, but in the end, think for yourself.

- Pick your battles.

- "[Don't] worry if people like you for the wrong reason. Just use that energy to build on it."

- The people you choose to surround yourself with, and the way you act around them, are a reflection of who you are.

- Tears ≠ weakness.

- A certain amount of fear can be healthy as motivation, but it can creep up and dominate you. And really, "There's no reason to be afraid. Ever."

- Good intentions are not always enough.

- Knowing what you want is the first step. Then all you have to do is go after it.

- You don't decide who deserves what. That's not the question, anyway.

- Being forgotten is a form of death.

- We have so many broad generalizations and labels for everything and everyone, but it all defies categorization in one way or another. Or completely.

- Truth is in the reaction.

- Sometimes, if you can't fix it, the best thing you can do is not worry about it.

- At the end of the day, no matter what has happened, life goes on.

- Despair is easy. Faith is hard. That's why it's more worthwhile.

- We tend to run away when things get hard, and denial and avoidance can be ways of running.

- You always have a choice.

- Not all conflict is bad. Conflict is necessary to life. (But I still don't have to like it. Haha.)

- Being nice to people in small ways is so easy, and they add up.

- It's easy to corrupt an experience or feeling in retrospect, to question how real it was. If you believed in it in the moment, then it was real.

- Everyone has his own style, and it doesn't matter what it is, as long as you own it.

- If you're going to break the rules, have a thorough command of them first.

- We don't often act rationally with the people we love. What you say/do often differs from what you feel. The best love prompts acts of sanity, as well as romantic stuff--you treat them the way you know you should treat a person you love.

- "Everyone goes haywire sometimes, and if we don't, then maybe we ought to."

- Even when you've got nothing, you can still tell stories.

- Sometimes fighting means stooping down. Sometimes it means standing up.

- "The human condition is defined by irony."

- Life is good.

Maybe I'll add more another time.

1/21/09, 10:01 PM
1/26/09 12:54 AM
Just added more.

I finally figured out the problem.

I have answers. I really do. Not all of them. But some.

AND I'm willing to share them.

Because, I have answers for anyone who isn't me.

The answers I have for me don't match my questions.

I've figured out the problem.

Now I just need a solution.

And sadly, 42 doesn't work here.

I get that we're not supposed to have all the answers to all our questions, and I don't really want them, but it would really be nice if they matched up once in a while. If only for a change of pace.

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Now playing: Chris Ayer - The Center Ring

Requisite Post on the Golden Globes.

I love awards season.

Of course, the Academy Awards are the big ones. But I'm also a fan of the Screen Actors Guild Awards and the Golden Globes. The SAG Awards are the only awards for both film and television actors chosen solely by their fellow actors, and the award itself is for "Outstanding Performance." The Golden Globes are awarded by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association for both film and television as well.

Sure, there are other awards. There are the other guild awards, major American critics' association awards, other awards from abroad like the BAFTA's, the National Board of Review's Top 10 films of the year list, and ones like the Independent Spirit Awards, which I personally enjoy, even though they're commercialized like Sundance is now. But anyway. To me, the Globes, SAG's, and Oscars are the big 3. Yeah, there's the red carpet, where some of the glamour and class (except for, ya know, people like J. Lo) of Old Hollywood come back for a while, and the men (and Diane Keaton) don perfect suits (except for Johnny Depp), and the women pull out the (mostly) gorgeous designer gowns and jewels. (This year...two thumbs DOWN to Cameron Diaz, Renee Zellweger, Angelina Jolie, Blake Lively, Laura Dern, Eva Mendes, and Maggie Gyllenhaal. YIKES.) But more than anything, it's about the recognition of great work done in the film and television industry, and it's a celebration of the mediums.

That's one of the great things about the Globes: it's like one big party. The ceremony isn't in a big theater, like the Oscars are--it's like a big banquet, with everyone at round tables throughout the room. There's no host, like at the Academy Awards, or the Tonys or Emmys, and there are no performances of the musical numbers or stupid montages. Just clips from the nominees for the Best Drama and Best Comedy/Musical categories, and whatever silly banter/jokes the presenters force upon us. During commercial breaks, the honorees get up and mingle, visiting each others' tables and catching up. This year there was a shot of Anne Hathaway literally skipping across the room to see someone in a long, blue, Armani gown, and a lot of shots of Drew Barrymore looking like a drunken fool who forgot big hair went out in the '60s.

I'm often not pleased with the HFPA's choices. I always have to remind myself that they are the Hollywood FOREIGN Press Association, so they (all what, 90 of them?) probably tend to pick films with more international appeal. This year, though, I was happy with pretty much everything.

Kate Winslet finally won a Golden Globe, at the beginning of the ceremony...and then won her second at the end. She'd been 0 for 5--same with the Oscars--and god, if anyone deserves a Golden Globe and an Academy Award, it's Kate Winslet. I'm ecstatic that she won--I really thought she had no chance at the Best Actress in a Drama one, I thought it was going to be Anne Hathaway for Rachel Getting Married. I'm dying to see Revolutionary Road.

I was also surprised that Colin Farrell won Best Actor in a Comedy/Musical, but happy. I'm not really a Colin Farrell fan, but I saw him in Cassandra's Dream last winter--a dark and depressing Woody Allen flick--and the film he won for, In Bruges, was excellent. Just hysterical, first of all, but it was a very dark comedy--very British in its dry humor. The story was good, and both Farrell and his fellow nominee Brendan Gleeson played their parts to perfection. Seems like he's on the up and up and it's good--he can definitely be great with the right roles.

Heath Ledger won for Best Supporting Actor, which I expected, but this is where I hate the HFPA, for having stupid, stupid categories: there's Best Actor/Actress in a Drama, Best Actor/Actress in a Comedy/Musical, and then Best Supporting Actor/Actress in a Film. Only one supporting category. So Heath Ledger was up against...TOM CRUISE and Robert Downey Jr. for Tropic Thunder, Ralph Fiennes for The Duchess, and Philip Seymour Hoffman for Doubt. Okay. So you have the biggest action flick/drama of the year with the most notoriety surrounding it. You have the biggest comedy/action flick of the year. You have a period piece. And you have a drama adapted from a Tony-award-winning play about an Catholic priest accused of abusing a student. Those films don't belong in one category at all.

Same thing with television. "Best Performance by an Actor/Actress in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series, or Motion Picture Made for Television. " This year in the Supporting Actor category it was Neil Patrick Harris for "How I Met Your Mother," and then 4 from HBO programs: Denis Leary for the movie Recount, Jeremy Piven for the series "Entourage," Blair Underwood for the series "In Treatment," and Tom Wilkinson for the mini-series "John Adams." I would have liked Neil Patrick Harris to win because he is excellent on that show, but of course Tom Wilkinson was going to win for playing Ben freakin Franklin on an epic mini-series.

I really am glad for him, though, haha, and for "John Adams" in general. Paul Giamatti and Laura Linney both also won, and I love them--I think they're great and severly underrated by most people. The only person who might be better than Laura Linney at playing nutcases is Annette Bening, haha. I'm also glad for Tina Fey (who told all her internet haters to "suck it") and "Mad Men" and Slumdog Millionaire, but especially for Mickey Rourke. (Never thought I'd say that.)

Slumdog is amazing. I saw it tonight, and it's utterly, devastatingly heartbreaking, but beautiful in every way. The young actors were excellent, the cinematography was gorgeous, the music was perfect, and the story was compelling. Some lovingly beautiful shots of India, in this, but god--I have a friend who is studying abroad there for a semester, and even though I know she's in the southern countryside, this still made me nervous for her. So much pain and suffering there. It was a great film overall, and I'd definitely say it deserved its four wins for Best Drama, Best Director, Best Screenplay, and Best Score.

Even so, The Wrestler has probably been my favorite movie this season. I'm not kidding when I say Mickey Rourke is brilliant in it. He deserved that Best Actor award, and I sincerely hope he gets the Oscar, because really, who cares about his dark personal life? If anything, the film is that much more powerful for the parallels you can draw between Mickey on screen and off. It's such a loving portrait of a guy who's rough all around, and who doesn't have much in his life to love. Darren Aronofsky's direction is great, but I attended a conversation with the producer, screenwriter, editor, art director, and one of the main cameramen, and from them I know--a large part of Rourke's performance was ad libbed. They would do a few takes the way Aronofsky wanted to, and then they'd let him play around. He fought pitched battles in defense of his character, Randy "The Ram", when he and Aronofsky disagreed about something. It pays off. There are a few plot holes and some shallowness in the other characters, but it's easy to overlook that. And the song that plays over the credits, which Bruce Springsteen wrote as a favor to Mickey at his request, is the perfect coda for the film. Bruce won the Golden Globe for Best Song for it, and every time I hear it, I still tear up--it was that powerful.

Okay, I don't want to build it up too much and have people disappointed. But really, it's worth seeing. Definitely. Slumdog and Benjamin Button, too--if there's anything that disappointed me with the Globes, it's that Benjamin Button got shut out completely. I would have liked to see David Fincher get a little credit, because he did a fabulous job.

That's more than enough for now. Academy Award nominations are announced January 22nd. January 25th is the SAG Awards (go "Boston Legal"!), and then the Academy Awards themselves are February 22nd. I can't wait.

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Now playing: Chris Ayer - The Center Ring

"We do what we can with people with the time we have with them..."

Saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button the other day with my mum. Enjoyed it very much--strong, yet subtle. Very well done. It reminded me of two things that I tend to believe.

1) Everything happens when it's supposed to happen. Everything that happens is a resulting confluence of other happenings and it does so for a reason. What that reason is, and who or what determines it, I don't know. But in my mind, that's how it is.

2) We have a finite amount of time with the people we meet, and all we can do is be grateful for it and enjoy it while it lasts, learn something from it, and let it go when it's run its course. There's no point in trying to hold onto something that has faded away; all that will do is cause you grief. Sometimes I think we try to hold on when we feel interrupted and transplanted--when we're not prepared for the end. Then we don't want to let go. But other times, I think we're given signs, warnings, that the going has gotten rough. We then come to see that perhaps, that a relationship has become tumultuous and corruptive and is doing more harm than good, or that it isn't just changing--it's wilting. That can be tricky, because change can be embraced and both parties can adapt, but some things cannot be overcome. That was the tragedy of The Goat--Martin, Stevie, and Billy loved each other, but something so deeply unsettling and life-altering had occurred, that they did not know if their love for each other could overcome this event that had shaken them each to their core--that had caused them to reevaluate everything they thought they knew.

But I digress. As so often happens at 3 in the morning. Anyway, that's what Benjamin Button reminded me of, with the wide array of characters that Benjamin encountered throughout his life. I'd understand if a critic faulted the script with introducing too many supporting characters that had a very minimal amount of screen time. That worked, to me, though, because it felt real. There were people that Benjamin was close with for years of his life, yet there were some who had a lot of influence over him that he only knew for a short time. Funny enough, even though he was growing younger all the time, he almost never looked back once someone was gone. He just took what he'd learned and loved and moved on to the next stage of his life, the next adventure, the next project. He stayed in the moment. It really is the richest way of living, I think.

And by learning to let go, I don't mean learning not to care. In a way, I think learning to care requires one to learn to let go. And acceptance doesn't often come over night. Though it'd be nice if it did.

I've discovered that I find a lot of comfort and hope in Bruce's words, though, in "Atlantic City":

Everything dies, baby, that's a fact,

But maybe everything that dies, some day comes back.

<3

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Now playing: John Mayer - Love Soon

Watching Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip again.

One of the many things I really enjoy about Studio 60 is its serious treatment of comedy. Matthew Perry's character Matt Albie is the head writer of a sketch comedy show, and Aaron Sorkin's teleplays always emphasized the tight relationship between the writer and the actor, and the technical chops it takes to be funny. Both Matt and the actors have a rich understanding of the history of television comedy--of comedy in general--they smart, and they have frame of reference. I like that.

I started rewatching the series again tonight. Matt Albie rarely smiles. He's usually bitingly sarcastic and cynical, and his personal humor is very dry. The sketches are witty and sharp, often ironic, and a little wicked. He takes comedy seriously, and knows that writing funny stuff doesn't require him to be a funny person; frequently, it requires him to be bold and brave. He knows how to deconstruct something and find the joke in it; he understands the importance of timing and the proper placement of a punchline. The actors credit the writing--Matt puts the words in their mouths--and he credits their delivery. It's both, though, and it's also more than that.

"I don't want her to have to make it work. I want it to work when it's handed to her," he says of one sketch. From the writer's point of view, it shouldn't take any work on the actor's part for the sketch to be funny. It should just be funny. Yet, in order to simply work from the beginning, it has to be something the actor can deliver. It has to play to their strengths. I love that this show points that out. There's one arc that chronicles the relationship between Matt and the leading actress Harriet, and the story is that he was a staff writer for two years before she came to the show as a young unknown. They both became big at the same time--when he started writing sketches for her. He responded well to her comedic talents, her timing, her rhythms, and he was able to capture that in his writing. That's one of the reason's he's a good writer: he can identify an actor's strengths and tease them, nuance them, to get the best performances possible.

In that sense, I think it must be easier to write with a performer in mind. There's a romantic comedy that I particularly enjoy by Nancy Meyer called Something's Gotta Give, starring Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton. They play their roles perfectly and their chemistry is excellent. I think this is largely in part because the roles were written for them. Same with the new movie The Wrestler. The screenwriter, Robert Siegel, used to be an editor for The Onion. Almost as soon as he started writing, he had Mickey Rourke in mind for the lead, and could never imagine someone else in that role. After seeing it, I really can't see anyone else playing Randy "the Ram" the way Rourke did--I can't see anyone else in the role at all. I've heard rumors of a few other potentials that casting came up with when they thought they wouldn't be able to get Rourke (largely for insurance reasons)--Nicholas Cage, Bruce Willis--but neither of those would be anywhere close to right. No matter how good their performance was, it wouldn't have been remotely good enough to carry the film the way Rourke does.

On a separate note, Studio 60 always had great music. "Under Pressure". Paolo Nutini's "New Shoes". A cover of "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?". Excellent.

Also, I really like ginger ale.

Also, happy new year.